My bio (@banhass) reads "I like to over analyse and suffer". And it's true. I overthink a lot. I question everything. I call people out on their bullshit. But I also call myself out on my own bullshit. The following is a list of things that have been playing on my mind.
1. "It's not about aesthetics. You don't have to lose weight. F*ck society"
I am Personal Trainer who assists people with weight-loss. I can scream "do it for the way you feel" and I can tell my clients not to worry about the number on the scale, their measurements, their body fat % but truth be told, the majority of people still want aesthetic goals. Dress it up how you want to, but I am helping these people reach these goals. My livelihood is built (initially) on people paying me to change the way their body looks.
2. "Fitness is for everyone. Fitness is not exclusive"
She says working in boutique fitness. I work in studios across London where people are privileged to pay up to £25.00 for a 45 minute class and a delightful frozen scented towel. Let's get real, not everyone is lucky enough to be able to afford this luxury. It's the equivalent of a 20 something year old fitspo who's had 3 gap yahs telling you to live your dream and pursue your passion.
3. "Your body does not define you"
But hey guys, here's the occasional picture of me in my swimsuit which is gonna motivate and inspire you to do better - said no one ever.
I sometimes feel bad about these pictures. They are not intended to 'motivate' or 'inspire'. And it's not for validation either (but naturally that comes with it) It is simply...marketing. It's used to get a message across that wouldn't have been seen or heard on a picture of my grilled chicken salad. It is clickbait.
4. "You don't have to workout 5 times a week!"
But this week I lifted 9 times, ran 2 marathons, taught 5 spin classes and did CrossFit on my rest day. I sometimes feel worried about posting too many workouts. I feel worried that it's going to make someone else feel guilty. Here's the thing. I am a personal trainer. I am a "fitness professional". It's in my interest to say fit and more importantly it's my job because I love it. I have no kids. I am single. I have no 'real' responsibilities. My priorities are different to yours. I am able to work-out more than the average person. The sooner you realise that you shouldn't be copying your favourite #fitspo the happier you will be.
5. "Know your worth! Have confidence! Be sassy!"
Most people assume (for one reason or another) that I have my sh*t together. That I am confident in everything I do. That I don't give a sh*t what people think. The truth is, I give way too many sh*ts. I give so many sh*ts. When it comes to work I don't practice what I preach. I am a perfectionist to the point where I sometimes sabotage myself. I get stressed. I get nervous. This is not the self-love which I bang on about. This is self-harm.
6. "F*ck diet culture!"
But if you’re looking to lose weight (BUT REMEMBER YOU DON’T HAVE TO!) but if you really, really want to, consider increasing your veggies and make sure you’re getting enough protein in your diet.
I'm guilty. I have said this before. And I am not the only Personal Trainer 'with a difference' interested in 'making people feel better' who has done this. A lot of us are guilty.
Whilst I may not support obvious ‘fad diets’ and ‘detoxes’ I am in some respect still supporting diet culture. It’s just a little less obvious.
Stay strong, Stay sassy, Love yourself but also analyze and be critical of how you think, act and behave. Be aware of your own bullsh*t. Ban x